Retailers' e-mails that caused me to guffaw

[Neal.Mollen]

Every time Envoyer says they are offering the only bottles in the USA of a wine I already bought from a US retailer. Happens every couple of weeks.

It just means you bought the last of them!

Parker licensed every writer and retail to declaim the wine they are hawking “the [this] of [that].” “The Mouton of the Monongahela Valley.” “The Flaccianello of Flatbush.” “The Salon of Saigon.”

The Mad Dog of Montalcino

The Echezeaux of West Fargo.

[John_Morris]

BTW, talking of apostrophes why do both Sotheby’s and Christie’s have them?

Same reason Macy’s does: We tend to refer to sellers in the possessive. I suspect it’s because, when the company name is a surname, we think of it once having been a person’s establishment.

It has become force of habit, so we add an S in speech even when the legal name is not in possessive form. Have you ever heard someone not add an S to Nordstrom or JC Penney?

[John_Morris]

“Imagine cutting into a thick, grass-fed, dry-aged ribeye that was expertly encrusted in its own fat within a scorching cast iron pan. Tirelessly basted with golden butter and finished with flaky sea salt. Crispy on the outside while pink and tender in the middle. Primal grazing cow-like flavor, meaty, minerally and moderately funky like buttered popcorn from weeks of solitary dry-aging. Smoky, pulverized andouille sausage compound butter drips and oozes into every crevice and glazes the beef with an extra sheen of flavor. Vibrant, locally-grown sweet red peppers are charred underneath and tossed in a piquant lime aioli. Dark purple, hedonistic wine is slowly poured into your goblet generating frothy violet-hued foam that reeks of fermented blackberries, asphalt and roasted espresso beans. Are you in heaven? Nope, you’re just preparing the perfect compliment to this red hot steaming deal.”

We need citations here, folks!

[John_Morris]

Every time Envoyer says they are offering the only bottles in the USA of a wine I already bought from a US retailer. Happens every couple of weeks.

It just means you bought the last of them!

Parker licensed every writer and retail to declaim the wine they are hawking “the [this] of [that].” “The Mouton of the Monongahela Valley.” “The Flaccianello of Flatbush.” “The Salon of Saigon.”

The Mad Dog of Montalcino

“Poughkeepsie is the Paris of upstate New York,” was a metaphor used by John Searle, a philosophy professor of mine in my undergrad days.

But I digress…

[DanielP]

It just means you bought the last of them!

Parker licensed every writer and retail to declaim the wine they are hawking “the [this] of [that].” “The Mouton of the Monongahela Valley.” “The Flaccianello of Flatbush.” “The Salon of Saigon.”

The Mad Dog of Montalcino

The Echezeaux of West Fargo.

”For my money, this estate is the DRC of Moscato d’Asti.” Apologies to Ian d’Agata.

[JBrochu]

“Imagine cutting into a thick, grass-fed, dry-aged ribeye that was expertly encrusted in its own fat within a scorching cast iron pan. Tirelessly basted with golden butter and finished with flaky sea salt. Crispy on the outside while pink and tender in the middle. Primal grazing cow-like flavor, meaty, minerally and moderately funky like buttered popcorn from weeks of solitary dry-aging. Smoky, pulverized andouille sausage compound butter drips and oozes into every crevice and glazes the beef with an extra sheen of flavor. Vibrant, locally-grown sweet red peppers are charred underneath and tossed in a piquant lime aioli. Dark purple, hedonistic wine is slowly poured into your goblet generating frothy violet-hued foam that reeks of fermented blackberries, asphalt and roasted espresso beans. Are you in heaven? Nope, you’re just preparing the perfect compliment to this red hot steaming deal.”

We need citations here, folks!

I need a smoke and a cold shower after that one.

[Victor_Hong]

BTW, talking of apostrophes why do both Sotheby’s and Christie’s have them?

Same reason Macy’s does: We tend to refer to sellers in the possessive. I suspect it’s because, when the company name is a surname, we think of it once having been a person’s establishment.

It has become force of habit, so we add an S in speech even when the legal name is not in possessive form. Have you ever heard someone not add an S to Nordstrom or JC Penney?

Bankruptcy lawyers.

[JDavisRoby]

Not a retailer, but Herman Story release notes from Russ From are fantastic.

[Sc0tt_F_tzgerald]

“Imagine cutting into a thick, grass-fed, dry-aged ribeye that was expertly encrusted in its own fat within a scorching cast iron pan. Tirelessly basted with golden butter and finished with flaky sea salt. Crispy on the outside while pink and tender in the middle. Primal grazing cow-like flavor, meaty, minerally and moderately funky like buttered popcorn from weeks of solitary dry-aging. Smoky, pulverized andouille sausage compound butter drips and oozes into every crevice and glazes the beef with an extra sheen of flavor. Vibrant, locally-grown sweet red peppers are charred underneath and tossed in a piquant lime aioli. Dark purple, hedonistic wine is slowly poured into your goblet generating frothy violet-hued foam that reeks of fermented blackberries, asphalt and roasted espresso beans. Are you in heaven? Nope, you’re just preparing the perfect compliment to this red hot steaming deal.”

We need citations here, folks!

I need a smoke and a cold shower after that one.

I’ll have what he’s having!

[Andrew_K]

1. You have a problem with the plural possessive? My intention was to start a thread about various missives that make us guffaw. So it was meant to be plural.

2. I’m saying that I wish he was just a wee bit sheepish about the price. I mean, if this is such a rare and cherished thing, why does it need such a marketing push?

1. OK the “me” singular confused me. Carry on.

2. I suppose that’s true. But salesmen will be salesmen!

[Craig_G]

I’m confused. Who wouldn’t be happy and excited to have Coche to sell at extraordinary markups?

[m_ristev]

I guffawed when the post title said “retailers’”, but that’s neither here nor there.

Is this just Coche envy or are you actually complaining about the price being higher than s other retailers?

Highly doubt that he has Coche envy.

As good as the Aligoté is, $200 is a lot of money for wine that is probably not more than €15– ex-cellars.

i would argue that even for 15 euro it is a poor aligote; thin, acidic, too much wood. no matter what the salesmen might say, this is not overachieving like d’auvenay.

[Brian_S_t_o_t_t_e_r]

Every time an email says “[famous winery]’s neighbor”

[David_K_o_l_i_n]

BTW, talking of apostrophes why do both Sotheby’s and Christie’s have them?

Same reason Macy’s does: We tend to refer to sellers in the possessive. I suspect it’s because, when the company name is a surname, we think of it once having been a person’s establishment.

It has become force of habit, so we add an S in speech even when the legal name is not in possessive form. Have you ever heard someone not add an S to Nordstrom or JC Penney?

Bankruptcy lawyers.

I know Penney bankruptcy lawyers that refer to the company as Penney’s

[Ethan_Abraham]

BTW, talking of apostrophes why do both Sotheby’s and Christie’s have them?

Same reason Macy’s does: We tend to refer to sellers in the possessive. I suspect it’s because, when the company name is a surname, we think of it once having been a person’s establishment.

It has become force of habit, so we add an S in speech even when the legal name is not in possessive form. Have you ever heard someone not add an S to Nordstrom or JC Penney?

I don’t! This seems like a British habit more than anything…hell I’ve seen Brits at work refer to “goldman’s”.

[Jim_Stewart]

“Drink now - 2055”

[joejolesch]

“The NDA to end all NDAs!”
“$200+ at the winery, $20 for you today”

And +1 to Jim’s comment…”offers immediate pleasure, but will evolve for decades.”

[John_Morris]

BTW, talking of apostrophes why do both Sotheby’s and Christie’s have them?

Same reason Macy’s does: We tend to refer to sellers in the possessive. I suspect it’s because, when the company name is a surname, we think of it once having been a person’s establishment.

It has become force of habit, so we add an S in speech even when the legal name is not in possessive form. Have you ever heard someone not add an S to Nordstrom or JC Penney?

I don’t! This seems like a British habit more than anything…hell I’ve seen Brits at work refer to “goldman’s”.

Yes, that is common there. I know the law firm Slaughter and May is often referred to as Slaughters, too. One assumes that Barclays and Sainsburys began as surnames without the S.

But the British S suffix doesn’t usually have the apostrophe. Is it plural, since in British English, corporations take plural verbs?

But we digress again…

[Andrew_K]

Just got this one this morning on a 2019 Auslese GK.

“Wait, if you can, for this to really open up in 2023 or 2024”

[G_Curd]

“Drink now - 2055”